Chronic stress, depression, burnout. Many people in our society feel emotionally and physically exhausted. This is why self-care is important, according to the thesis of psychologist Ulrike Scheuermann. Self-care is the foundation for the balance of body and mind. For the goal is to develop a healthy life – with a stable sense of self-worth, inner strength, and serenity.
About the author:
Ulrike Scheuermann is a psychologist and author of the book "Self Care – Du bist wertvoll" (Self-Care – You are valuable). She combines modern approaches from medicine, psychology, and spirituality.
Medicom: Self-care is essential for a good life, yet most people live with the belief that it is something they are not allowed to do.
Ulrike Scheuermann: We all know we are encouraged to do something for ourselves. Exercise, eat healthily, etc. But if you call that by its proper name, as I do in my book "Self Care – You are valuable," you often hear: "That’s selfish; there’s already enough of that in our society." In fact, however, this self-care is so important because it is the root, the basis for everything we build upon it. And, as I also state at the end of the book: Self-care is world-care. If we have good self-compassion, we can be significantly more compassionate toward others and thus toward the whole world.
Medicom: You only have the strength you need to care for others if you have it for yourself first.
Ulrike Scheuermann: Many people I work with are too exhausted. They are drained because they have been "too good" at taking care of others instead of themselves, and at some point, they simply have nothing left to give.
Unplug: Take a deep breath and let go of your thoughts and emotions
Medicom: But in order to really practice self-care, some must first learn to listen to their own bodies again, because we have become far too oriented toward the outside world and no longer understand the body's signals. How can one find their way back?
Ulrike Scheuermann: Rediscovering one's own bodily wisdom is a very important point. We receive many messages and tips from the outside world on the topic of exercise; there are countless apps and guidebooks. That is a good thing, but it can lead to no longer perceiving your own very individual body messages. You have to keep grounding yourself in your own body and developing a keen sense of body awareness. You can use the body as a compass and react accordingly. For example, in the case of overexertion.
You have to keep grounding yourself in your own body and developing a keen sense of body awareness. You can use the body as a compass and react accordingly. For example, in the case of overexertion.
Medicom: Isn't there an intermediate step necessary in this day and age? We are so strongly shaped by external images of how our bodies "should" be—that we must be young, firm, slim, etc.—that we stand in our own way regarding self-love and self-acceptance. As a result, we have no chance of really listening to our bodies.
Ulrike Scheuermann: It is probably true that you can only respect the body and its signals when you love it as it is. Sometimes in my seminars, I encounter people who treat their bodies very aggressively, almost as if they are in a fight. If that is the case, loving, empathetic perception cannot take place.
Medicom: It is much easier for us to acknowledge that we have a different eye color, hair color, or nose length than others. But when it comes to our figure, self-love and tolerance stop. Life is better without mirrors and comparisons.
Ulrike Scheuermann: Yes, and yet it is very difficult to live without mirrors or comparisons. You can practice this path in other ways, namely by viewing others with more love and less judgment and criticism.
Medicom: A very important concept appears repeatedly in your book. What is emotion and what information can we gain through emotions?
Ulrike Scheuermann: Emotion is a very complex topic. It is often proclaimed that you should "live out" your emotions. I am a bit more cautious there. If you frequently find yourself in difficult feelings—that is, psychological, emotional states like envy, anger, hatred, aggression, or grief—this can be very burdensome. It is about finding a healthy way to handle these on your own first. That is, not necessarily acting them out immediately, but letting the feelings mature or talking about them with someone else before putting a strain on a relationship. Emotions can change very quickly, within a few hours or overnight, and a certain sense of serenity often sets in. I recommend waiting a little, perhaps sleeping on it, before reacting. Relationships can definitely benefit from that.
Emotion is a very complex topic. Emotions can change very quickly, within a few hours or overnight, and a certain sense of serenity often sets in.
Medicom: In your book, you introduce a very helpful system called Logosynthesis.
Ulrike Scheuermann: Emotions—or rather, reactions—often follow patterns that were formed very early on or in childhood, and one adopts that old pattern when faced with a similar trigger. Logosynthesis uses linguistic formulations to help neutralize these triggers, which is, of course, a great relief. Because through this method, you can very quickly control stress symptoms and anxiety symptoms and induce relaxation.
Medicom: It is often negative thoughts, cycles of rumination, and moods that burden us heavily. What else can help set us free? Nature, movement?
Ulrike Scheuermann: Definitely; spending time in nature and, of course, movement are extremely helpful, although I place great value on the idea that everyone should find out for themselves what truly makes them feel good. Ideally, of course, that is exercise that gets you a little out of breath, because it improves your mood enormously and you feel brighter and more cheerful afterward.
Spending time in nature, especially in connection with water and trees, also has a strongly positive effect on our thoughts and our immune system.
Nature grounds us. Spending time outdoors is positive for both body and mind.
Medicom: In your book, you suggest "writing sprints" for this purpose—writing down thoughts as quickly as possible without pausing, for just a few minutes at a time. This is part of your "writing-thinking" approach, where you use writing as a tool for thinking, learning, and feeling.
Ulrike Scheuermann: Yes, I recommend keeping a self-care journal. Because writing is an encounter with yourself, and in doing so, you get in touch with yourself very well. It would be best to develop a daily routine—a way to take a small amount of "self-care time" every day and have a conversation with yourself. Writing things down has different effects than just thinking about them; it is emotionally relieving and clarifying—indeed, therapeutic. An enormously powerful exercise here is also to write down what you are grateful for. You immediately feel very fulfilled and gifted.
Medicom: How can one maintain this attitude of gratitude even in difficult situations, or see a challenge as an opportunity to learn?
Ulrike Scheuermann: That is, of course, very difficult when you are in the middle of a crisis. In an acute state of suffering, you cannot think that way. It usually comes only when you are slowly reaching the end of the crisis or have already been through a few crises. Then you can ask yourself: What have I learned through this situation? To what extent am I different now than I was before? How has my personality matured? If you can ask yourself that at the end, then what happened had at least some kind of meaning. That, in turn, can be very comforting. There is a saying I like very much and find helpful: "If the day was not your friend, it was your teacher."
Medicom: In your book, you speak about the connection between body, psyche, and essence. What do you mean by essence?
Ulrike Scheuermann: I believe we all feel that we are more than just this. Essence is something greater than our human selves. It is not easy to find an access point that fits everyone. For some, it is the "big picture," the universe, or perhaps God or the divine. I would express it by saying it is something greater than we are, something where we have a sense of the big picture, to which we are connected and linked. And where we feel and know that we are connected to all other things and living beings in this world.
Medicom: That is presumably also what people call the meaning of life, which helps us in the search for our life's purpose.
Ulrike Scheuermann: I experience this again and again in my seminars: that people are happiest when they have found their calling or are able to give a gift to others and to the world through their unique talent. Then they can look back on a happy and fulfilled life later—and that is, after all, the greatest wish we all share.
Medicom: Thank you very much for this conversation about self-care.
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